Hello October

Wow, when I mentioned in my last post that I planned on cutting back how often I post, I really did not expect to just stop posting. But, before I knew it, the last couple of weeks just flew by. Every once in a while, posting would cross my mind, but I never had anything specific to say, and I usually ended up distracted immediately with something else.

Life has continued to feeling overwhelming. I feel like a beginner juggler who has been told that I need to start by keeping 10 different balls in the air, before I’ve even mastered one or two. And so stuff just keeps crashing down around me.

I’m getting a tiny bit better at doing what absolutely has to be done. But I also know I need to really work on how to a) let things go and b) do whats important to me, even if it means dropping a ball that affects others. The second one probably seems a little crazy, but it’s felt like I’ve been dealing with the opposite so long – where others just don’t do something knowing I’ll pick up the slack, which results in me suffering the most. And I need to break away from this, or I’m never going to finish my PhD.

I actually had a really productive research day yesterday. I sat down with my nemesis, the xbox, and restarted my entire experiment. And then made signficant progress. I have 5 “pieces” that need to be done, and I finished 3 of them. Now, I’m using finished relatively loosely, in that I need to run the results by my supervisor and they will likely need some small tweaks. The goal for today is to make the remaining two. After that, all that’s left to get ready to run, is getting my experiment approved by the psych department and putting together the actual version that participants will see (I’m taking videos of the stuff on the xbox). The goal is to at least get the documents out for approval by the end of the week. My supervisor is away right now, but back next week, which hopefully means finalizing everything then and being ready to test.

The startup continues to be 2 days away from launching. Right when I think we’re ready, another tiny issue appears, that, while tiny, is big enough that it needs to be fixed before we can actually launch. I’m really hoping that by next Monday we’ll be launched. But… who knows

No promises on when I’ll post next, but hopefully it won’t be as long as the last break. I hope your September was less stressful than mine.

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